#Reverb13 is a prompt-a-day series for the month of December that is meant to give participants the chance to reflect on the past year and take the opportunity to write down some hopes for the coming year.
Prompt 7: What was your biggest accomplishment of 2013?
Looking back, this year doesn't have many moments of certificate-worthy accomplishments. There were many more occasions after which an "I survived" sticker would have been more appropriate.
Including today, as I attempt to decorate the Christmas tree in true obsessive-compulsive style while HRH attempts to "help."
Serenity now. Except change serenity to beer, and we're good.
But honestly? My biggest accomplishment is (finally) applying for - and being accepted into - my masters degree. Ever since we moved back to Arizona, after Husband earned his masters at Western Michigan, it's been "my turn" to go back to school. I've wanted to; I'm one of those Hermione Granger-esque über students who just loooooooooooooves learning. But then, things happened.
I got pregnant.
I had a baby.
I got laid off.
I started a new job.
I procrastinated.
And then, and then, and then.
No more. While I had hoped to get in this fall, I did procrastinate just enough to miss the boat, so I'll be a Northern Arizona University Lumberjack (and I'm OK), studying English literature - online - starting in January, over a decade after I walked across the stage to accept my two bachelors degrees.
Better Late Than Never? I suppose. To me, it's more like It's About Damn Time.
Saturday, December 7, 2013
Friday, December 6, 2013
Reverb 13 · Prompt 6 · Blowing Out the Candles
#Reverb13 is a prompt-a-day series for the month of December that is meant to give participants the chance to reflect on the past year and take the opportunity to write down some hopes for the coming year.
Prompt 6: How did you celebrate the passing of another year? Did it turn out the way you had hoped?
Years never turn out how we hope. Resolutions made at the dawn of a new year convey all the loftiest of hopes, which is probably why resolutions tend to fail. Life gets in the ways of those lofty ideals. The time we want to spend with others, the money we want to save, the things we want to do - all of those are too often shunted aside when deadlines loom and the s*** hits the proverbial fan. Even when we look to make "realistic" resolutions and goals (looking straight in the mirror here), those goals never take into account the small moments, which are the Best Moments.
My birthday was a good reminder that hopes are fleeting, but that doesn't mean that Change Of Plans is a bad thing.
I had signed up for the Cave Creek Trail Run, a small event that is part of the town of Cave Creek's efforts to preserve a portion of the Sonoran Desert from development. I really only started trail running about a year ago, and I have fallen in love with it. Since I'd been dealing with shin splints at the beginning of the year, which prevented me from participating in an earlier trail race closer to home, I thought this would be a fabulous way to ring in my 35th year.
And then my foot went "LOLOLOLOL OMG SO FUNNY NOT HAPPENING!!!!"
Stupid tendinitis.
At the doctor's insistence, I took a two week break from running, which meant the trail run was out. But I still went to the run and volunteered, which meant that by the time the sun rose on my birthday morning, this was my view:
This is what the run seeks to preserve. Worth getting up to Not Run.
I've got the run on my calendar for 2014.
Once the event and a Happy Birthday To Me massage was over, I spent the day at home with Husband and HRH before sending HRH off with both my mom (who was in town for my birthday/her spring break/Easter) and Husband's mom so Husband and I could go out to dinner. Since we've been together, we've gone out for our birthdays, and even after HRH came along, we've continued to reserve these days, as well as our anniversary, as "us only" evenings.
This year, we went low key and headed up to Scottsdale to Brat Haüs for some sausage and beer. Being attached to my German ancestry as I am, I am always up for having some good brats und bier. I'm not one for large birthday parties, so just sitting outside, drinking my beer, talking with my husband without the subtext of "Mom! Mom! Mommy! Mommy! Mommy! Mama! Mama! Mama! Ma! Ma! Ma! Ma! Mum! Mum! Mum! Mum! Mummy! Mummy! Mumma! Mumma! Mumma!" in the background was exactly what I needed.
The next day, I was back to taking ridiculous pictures of Zooey.
Since March, has the year turned out like I had hoped? No. I mean, obviously I had planned to win big in the Powerball lottery, quit my job in rock star fashion, and drink Prosecco every day, but that hasn't turned out (pro tip: to win Powerball, you have to buy a ticket?), so it's back to the grind in the midst of daydreaming, and of course, being reminded that It's the Little Things that make each year worth celebrating.
Prompt 6: How did you celebrate the passing of another year? Did it turn out the way you had hoped?
Years never turn out how we hope. Resolutions made at the dawn of a new year convey all the loftiest of hopes, which is probably why resolutions tend to fail. Life gets in the ways of those lofty ideals. The time we want to spend with others, the money we want to save, the things we want to do - all of those are too often shunted aside when deadlines loom and the s*** hits the proverbial fan. Even when we look to make "realistic" resolutions and goals (looking straight in the mirror here), those goals never take into account the small moments, which are the Best Moments.
My birthday was a good reminder that hopes are fleeting, but that doesn't mean that Change Of Plans is a bad thing.
I had signed up for the Cave Creek Trail Run, a small event that is part of the town of Cave Creek's efforts to preserve a portion of the Sonoran Desert from development. I really only started trail running about a year ago, and I have fallen in love with it. Since I'd been dealing with shin splints at the beginning of the year, which prevented me from participating in an earlier trail race closer to home, I thought this would be a fabulous way to ring in my 35th year.
And then my foot went "LOLOLOLOL OMG SO FUNNY NOT HAPPENING!!!!"
Stupid tendinitis.
At the doctor's insistence, I took a two week break from running, which meant the trail run was out. But I still went to the run and volunteered, which meant that by the time the sun rose on my birthday morning, this was my view:
This is what the run seeks to preserve. Worth getting up to Not Run.
I've got the run on my calendar for 2014.
Once the event and a Happy Birthday To Me massage was over, I spent the day at home with Husband and HRH before sending HRH off with both my mom (who was in town for my birthday/her spring break/Easter) and Husband's mom so Husband and I could go out to dinner. Since we've been together, we've gone out for our birthdays, and even after HRH came along, we've continued to reserve these days, as well as our anniversary, as "us only" evenings.
This year, we went low key and headed up to Scottsdale to Brat Haüs for some sausage and beer. Being attached to my German ancestry as I am, I am always up for having some good brats und bier. I'm not one for large birthday parties, so just sitting outside, drinking my beer, talking with my husband without the subtext of "Mom! Mom! Mommy! Mommy! Mommy! Mama! Mama! Mama! Ma! Ma! Ma! Ma! Mum! Mum! Mum! Mum! Mummy! Mummy! Mumma! Mumma! Mumma!" in the background was exactly what I needed.
The next day, I was back to taking ridiculous pictures of Zooey.
Since March, has the year turned out like I had hoped? No. I mean, obviously I had planned to win big in the Powerball lottery, quit my job in rock star fashion, and drink Prosecco every day, but that hasn't turned out (pro tip: to win Powerball, you have to buy a ticket?), so it's back to the grind in the midst of daydreaming, and of course, being reminded that It's the Little Things that make each year worth celebrating.
Thursday, December 5, 2013
Reverb 13 · Prompt 5 · Challenge Accepted
#Reverb13 is a prompt-a-day series for the month of December that is meant to give participants the chance to reflect on the past year and take the opportunity to write down some hopes for the coming year.
Prompt 5: Did you take on a new challenge in 2013? What was it? Are there challenges that you deliberately avoided? How do you want to challenge yourself in 2014?
Some days, just the mere act of getting out of bed is a challenge. Like last night, when HRH woke at 2AM because of a nightmare, 3AM because of an accident (caused by another nightmare), and at 4AM because she bit her cheek (probably related to yet another nightmare). My alarm went off at 4:45. Parents round the world know this challenge all too well.
But if we're being honest with ourselves, which is the whole point of this exercise, my biggest challenge is confrontation.
I don't relish it. I don't really like to stir the pot when it comes to uncomfortable situations (I have no trouble doing that same pot stirring in an environment in which everyone knows I'm being a sassy pants). Speaking up when I know it could cause turmoil is something I'd just rather avoid. Keeping it in, while never the best decision, always just seems...easier. It's with that same mindset that I pretend the chaos of my junk drawer doesn't exist. I just ignore it and hope it will rectify itself.
Of course, my junk drawer is still as chaotic as it was yesterday, and those things left unsaid...well, they're still unsaid. Ideally, this could be a challenge I conquer in 2014, but I'm not going to make it a resolution or goal, since I've got a 35-year track record that doesn't place positive odds on that happening. But I can set a goal on improving, little by little.
Overcoming a challenge is just like losing weight anyway; there's no magic pill, and it doesn't happen overnight. But a pound is a pound, and a word is a word.
Prompt 5: Did you take on a new challenge in 2013? What was it? Are there challenges that you deliberately avoided? How do you want to challenge yourself in 2014?
Some days, just the mere act of getting out of bed is a challenge. Like last night, when HRH woke at 2AM because of a nightmare, 3AM because of an accident (caused by another nightmare), and at 4AM because she bit her cheek (probably related to yet another nightmare). My alarm went off at 4:45. Parents round the world know this challenge all too well.
But if we're being honest with ourselves, which is the whole point of this exercise, my biggest challenge is confrontation.
I don't relish it. I don't really like to stir the pot when it comes to uncomfortable situations (I have no trouble doing that same pot stirring in an environment in which everyone knows I'm being a sassy pants). Speaking up when I know it could cause turmoil is something I'd just rather avoid. Keeping it in, while never the best decision, always just seems...easier. It's with that same mindset that I pretend the chaos of my junk drawer doesn't exist. I just ignore it and hope it will rectify itself.
Of course, my junk drawer is still as chaotic as it was yesterday, and those things left unsaid...well, they're still unsaid. Ideally, this could be a challenge I conquer in 2014, but I'm not going to make it a resolution or goal, since I've got a 35-year track record that doesn't place positive odds on that happening. But I can set a goal on improving, little by little.
Overcoming a challenge is just like losing weight anyway; there's no magic pill, and it doesn't happen overnight. But a pound is a pound, and a word is a word.
Wednesday, December 4, 2013
Reverb 13 · Prompt 4 · 20/20
#Reverb13 is a prompt-a-day series for the month of December that is meant to give participants the chance to reflect on the past year and take the opportunity to write down some hopes for the coming year.
Prompt 4: 20/20 -- hindsight is the one thing from which we never benefit here in the present. Is there one moment you wish you could do over?
No.
For a long time after Dad died, I dwelled in the past. Wishing I could have changed things. Maybe if I hadn't left Washington for college. Maybe if I hadn't gone to Germany instead of coming home that summer. Maybe if I had taken a semester off.
If only, if only...
It's not a healthy way to live.
Actually, it's not a way to live period.
While I certainly have those moments upon which I can look back and cringe this year, I wouldn't do any of them over. Because then Today is Different.
I'm not saying that I'm perfect; this is something with which I struggle each and every day. Those moments when I think back to pre-1999 wondering if something I could have done could have prolonged my dad's life. There is still heartache and tension and some things that are best left un-blogged.
But at the end of the day, I am Here Today because of What I Did Yesterday. Yesterday is gone, so it's time to look to Today. That way Tomorrow is even better.
Prompt 4: 20/20 -- hindsight is the one thing from which we never benefit here in the present. Is there one moment you wish you could do over?
No.
For a long time after Dad died, I dwelled in the past. Wishing I could have changed things. Maybe if I hadn't left Washington for college. Maybe if I hadn't gone to Germany instead of coming home that summer. Maybe if I had taken a semester off.
If only, if only...
It's not a healthy way to live.
Actually, it's not a way to live period.
While I certainly have those moments upon which I can look back and cringe this year, I wouldn't do any of them over. Because then Today is Different.
I'm not saying that I'm perfect; this is something with which I struggle each and every day. Those moments when I think back to pre-1999 wondering if something I could have done could have prolonged my dad's life. There is still heartache and tension and some things that are best left un-blogged.
But at the end of the day, I am Here Today because of What I Did Yesterday. Yesterday is gone, so it's time to look to Today. That way Tomorrow is even better.
Reverb 13 · Prompt 3 · Brave
#Reverb13 is a prompt-a-day series for the month of December that is meant to give participants the chance to reflect on the past year and take the opportunity to write down some hopes for the coming year.
Prompt 3: What was the bravest thing you've done in 2013?
I rarely feel Brave, because Television tells me that Brave Is Riding Your Trusty Steed Toward The Horrible Dragon, and The Internet Says Brave Is Fighting A Terrifying Disease For Which There Is No Cure.
But Television and The Internet have their version (neither of which are Wrong), and I have mine.
Some days, Brave is calling an angry parent who is blaming you for her child's failure to submit an assignment. Some days, Brave is going to the grocery store the day before A Major Holiday. Some days, Brave is simply getting out of bed.
After my ordeal with shin splints, I was terrified to run my first race of the year, a 10K. But 1) I had already signed up, and 2) it was for a cause important to not one but two dear friends, and while they were both walking the 5K portion, I was going to run that damn race, come hell or high water.
I can assure you that my technical shirt and my compression sleeves matched, so I was Prepared.
I'm not a fast runner, and the fear that my shin splints would return have slowed me more this year. And that Fear was along for the ride for this First Race Back.
So, the night before, in true Kat fashion, I wrote this on my arches:
I am the tortoise; fear is the hare.
Fear was out in front that morning, but I was still in it.
When I got frightened that I wouldn't be able to finish the race, I zeroed in on that sentence, and repeated it, again and again and AGAIN, until I was out of the proverbial woods.
For me, putting one Saucony-clad foot in front of the other this year has been My Bravest Thing. I am still terrified that I will gracelessly injure myself (imagine a slow motion trip over the curb and getting entangled in the hound's leash; that's how I figure it'll go down), but I still head out the door and step off with my left foot. It's the stronger one.
Prompt 3: What was the bravest thing you've done in 2013?
I rarely feel Brave, because Television tells me that Brave Is Riding Your Trusty Steed Toward The Horrible Dragon, and The Internet Says Brave Is Fighting A Terrifying Disease For Which There Is No Cure.
But Television and The Internet have their version (neither of which are Wrong), and I have mine.
Some days, Brave is calling an angry parent who is blaming you for her child's failure to submit an assignment. Some days, Brave is going to the grocery store the day before A Major Holiday. Some days, Brave is simply getting out of bed.
After my ordeal with shin splints, I was terrified to run my first race of the year, a 10K. But 1) I had already signed up, and 2) it was for a cause important to not one but two dear friends, and while they were both walking the 5K portion, I was going to run that damn race, come hell or high water.
I can assure you that my technical shirt and my compression sleeves matched, so I was Prepared.
I'm not a fast runner, and the fear that my shin splints would return have slowed me more this year. And that Fear was along for the ride for this First Race Back.
So, the night before, in true Kat fashion, I wrote this on my arches:
I am the tortoise; fear is the hare.
Fear was out in front that morning, but I was still in it.
When I got frightened that I wouldn't be able to finish the race, I zeroed in on that sentence, and repeated it, again and again and AGAIN, until I was out of the proverbial woods.
For me, putting one Saucony-clad foot in front of the other this year has been My Bravest Thing. I am still terrified that I will gracelessly injure myself (imagine a slow motion trip over the curb and getting entangled in the hound's leash; that's how I figure it'll go down), but I still head out the door and step off with my left foot. It's the stronger one.
Reverb 13 · Prompt 2 · Shine
#Reverb13 is a prompt-a-day series for the month of December that is meant to give participants the chance to reflect on the past year and take the opportunity to write down some hopes for the coming year.
Prompt 2: What was the best moment of 2013?
Generally, I revel in superlatives. But I just can't with this one.
Just know that the best moments were not the big moments. They were the moments when you were twirling in the grass in your twirliest dress, or when you were wearing a fake pink mustache.
Nothing else comes close.
Prompt 2: What was the best moment of 2013?
Generally, I revel in superlatives. But I just can't with this one.
Just know that the best moments were not the big moments. They were the moments when you were twirling in the grass in your twirliest dress, or when you were wearing a fake pink mustache.
Reverb 13 · Prompt 1 · At the Start
#Reverb13 is a prompt-a-day series for the month of December that is meant to give participants the chance to reflect on the past year and take the opportunity to write down some hopes for the coming year.
I'm starting late, and I can't promise that I'll post for each one, but I think this will be a good chance to reflect and decompress during what is otherwise a fairly busy and yes, stressful time of year.
At the start: where did you start 2013? Give some background on this year.
I started 2013 injured, nursing the worst shin splints I had had since I was 18 and stubbornly refusing to give up either jumping or hurdling. I'd limped through December to meet a running goal that I only recently realized, through some actual math, wasn't accurate, and I was paying for it. No January trail race. Barely ready for a March 10K.
But thankfully, in my injury, I was turning over a new leaf, starting a better self maintenance plan, which I began almost immediately after the dawn of 2013, seeing the chiropractor regularly and making myself use the foam roller instead of just stretching it out.
But it was also the start of lofty goals to do and be more. Run more miles. Spend more time with my family. Give more to my favorite charities.
Reality: more is easier in January than any other month of the year.
I'm starting late, and I can't promise that I'll post for each one, but I think this will be a good chance to reflect and decompress during what is otherwise a fairly busy and yes, stressful time of year.
At the start: where did you start 2013? Give some background on this year.
I started 2013 injured, nursing the worst shin splints I had had since I was 18 and stubbornly refusing to give up either jumping or hurdling. I'd limped through December to meet a running goal that I only recently realized, through some actual math, wasn't accurate, and I was paying for it. No January trail race. Barely ready for a March 10K.
But thankfully, in my injury, I was turning over a new leaf, starting a better self maintenance plan, which I began almost immediately after the dawn of 2013, seeing the chiropractor regularly and making myself use the foam roller instead of just stretching it out.
But it was also the start of lofty goals to do and be more. Run more miles. Spend more time with my family. Give more to my favorite charities.
Reality: more is easier in January than any other month of the year.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)