Friday, August 12, 2011

To Husbands, With Love (A Pie for Mikey)

I don't know Jennie.
It's highly unlikely that I will ever meet Jennie face to face.
But today I am offering her a part of my heart so that it can break for her, so that perhaps hers can break a little less.
Jennie's blog, In Jennie's Kitchen, is one of many that I follow (no, it's not in the left-hand column; to be honest, I follow too many blogs to really have an adequate list over there, as I consider all of those blogs I follow to be fantastic in their own way).  I like that she focuses on seasonal and local, and her photos always make me hungry for whatever she's featuring.
Her most recent post, though, has nothing to do with food.  It's about her husband, Mikey.
She lost Mikey suddenly a week ago.  There wasn't even a moment in which she could say goodbye.  He was gone too quickly.

I don't know Jennie.
But my heart breaks with her and for her.  I ache for her girls who lost their father too soon.  I cry tears for a man, a husband and father, I never met.

That's why I made a peanut butter cream pie today.

Mikey loved peanut butter cream pie.  Like most of us, Jennie and Mikey's life had become busy, crazy, hectic - call it what you want, but basically, there wasn't always time to make a peanut butter cream pie.  There's alway tomorrow to make a pie, right?
Not anymore.
Jennie has asked her fellow bloggers to make a peanut butter cream pie and share it with family, friends, or loved ones.  She asked us to do this today and not tomorrow, because, she says, "today is the only guarantee we can count on."
I knew I needed to make a peanut butter cream pie.  I needed to make this pie more than I have ever needed to make a recipe.

The pictures are (top to bottom) my dad in his Army uniform, a family
picture when I was about two (?), and a snapshot taken in my dad's senior
year in high school (he was voted class cut-up).  I can't share this pie with my dad,
so I wanted to share these pictures with my readers.  Thanks to my cousin
Stacey for sending these to me.
I decided to share this pie with my fellow jurors.  These are certainly not people I count among my closest friends; four months ago, they were complete strangers.  Only the confines of the jury deliberation room two days a week has made us familiar.  But we now share a common thread, and I felt that is was only appropriate to ask them to share in the healing process that #apieformikey is designed to start.  They were only too happy to lift a fork and take a moment to honor Mikey, Jennie, and their girls. In those few minutes, we reflected that our gripes we often share between cases are so trivial and minor and that we all need to take some time to be grateful for those things and those people we all too often take for granted.
The leftovers were shared with my husband and daughter after a meal that I prepared for them (bacon for the Wee One, an attempt at chicken fried steak for my husband), and I reveled in the fact that we enjoyed a meal that, while disappointing, was prepared with love.  I am so thankful that I had this meal and that my husband can joke with me about that sorry excuse for fried steak.

Here's to you, Perillo family - here's to the love that you shared with one another and with those of us who read your blog.  If making a pie can help you learn this new version of "real life," I would gladly make a million of them.  Tonight, when I hug my family, I hope that you feel the warmth of my heart as I embrace you as well.

This is for you, Mikey.


  1. How beautiful. I think you really captured what so many of us have been feeling this week. Thank you for that, and thank you for sharing your family photos. Priceless. :)

  2. Sorry--that was me, @onlinepastrychf, up there. Apparently masquerading as my beloved. Silly Google acct. :)